today was pretty fine... we were dismissed @ 4. sooo i guess it is not the jackpot 5 dismissal owells.

my shin its really painful once again. gotta tighten it to do exercises. owells. as long i can run and kick some dust i think it will be fine. =)

maybe its the pain i endure to keep my mind off you. if i keep on going on, it tries to make me stop thinking of you, but everytime i see you, i cannot help it. i tried. i really tried.

im trying hard to study for history. wahh its so hard lah! alot of content but i think i can lah. i try.

so well about today, school went on pretty fine cuz got 3 period of chem and chem pract was damn fun. enjoyed it alot. after that it was math tutorial. OMG MISS TAI. AHHA MRS TAI daughter. OMG. she sent her daughter here =X not bad. SO much similarities between her and her mum. seriously damn funny.

after that it was a break then had PW. i think it was pretty fun. i really liked it that we discuss seriously. like i said, i had a good PW group. and best of all, I HAD arm wrestling competition. was draw chris and lose teacher. OKAY i played lik 5 games first. =D =D =D. so its fine. hahaha! i need to train more!


after school. had to go to the gym to work out some upper body cardio endurance and some pump. its hard to get the whip in the javelin if i dont do gym. so its pretty fine. saturday got competition. discus. im so unprepared for it. i dont haf that explosiveness with that bloody shin. sigh. this feeling sucks lar. i wan do well. but it hurts so much.

im so disappointed with yesterday throws. its like. half hearted and more painful. each step, it pains, now its both legs but more on the right. its hard to get the steps right and proper and to use the hip and then use the whip of the arm. then its like coach knows its hurting. thankfully he asked me to stop. i guess i shuldnt peak soon. 45 metres is enough this year. hopefully 47 metres if i can really do it.

so i went to church today. i guess its fine. i kinda lost the spirit to because of some uneventful stuff. but i dont know either why i lost the love for it. i used to teach it, to share what i know, to be similar in a different way, and each time i'm asked to do it, my intentions are questioned. what the hell. but owells, i almost teared today during the service in the morning in school. its like what i've predicted for myself this week. that song, i wanted was palyed actually, it felt like god is telling me something... but i dont wanna listen, what should i do?

i wanna be different, maybe a normal person. but i do try to be someone i was before. till i met you, maybe till i saw you, i felt different. even today and every other day, i dont know why i always see u when i wanna go somewhere. i mean its coincidental, but until like that. everytime walk somewhere then i get to see you, i dont know what to do sometimes, i chose to ignore, but its making me feel all messed up inside again. i so badly know what i wanna achieve. everything. i've made my goals, yet im willing to give up so much for someone i hardly know? though question that i dont understand such feelings, but feelings? feelings that i've felt before and lived so hard only to be left heartbroken? im not angel neither do i wan to be the devil. but i do know how to make things work, but the book shant be followed, because if i dare looked at you and say i love you, i will let my actions do the talking.

ahh im getting sleepy. listening to good charlotte's new album. thanks becky for sending me. darn i love them haha! its good friday tomorrow and i can do my homework. guess i'll ask some ppl out to study. everyone is like, "what AARON U STUDY!? erm... OKAY" but the tone was like disbelief lah. so i know im like REALLY STUDYING.

i wanna go cambridge. even if i dont go, at least i try.
i also want something else, but its the matters of the heart... something i cant control, something that i cant work alone with.




;
breaking free to something new. =)