i dont know what is wrong with me,
cuz i keep pushing away my feelings.
for i felt unsafe, my insecurity,
it was because, im jus too afraid again.


good news of the day that MAN U trashed the hopeless Roma 7-1. impressive start and its gonna get better.

school today was fine. i mean it was a pretty short day and tomorrow is gonna end at like 5?

training was fine, did some workout with the legs dynamics. OH BALLS. I GOT THE JAVELIN SPIKES NOW dont mess with me. hohohoho. it feels awkward at first as if there was bubble gum at the bottom of the shoes. haha. its "sticky" to the ground.

finally a 12.1 sec relax sprint run. i feel i could haf gone faster, maybe im jus too fat =(

it seemed impossible to recover. cuz today, the pain is killing me from inside my shin. its shreiking like what the hell seriously and its affecting my walking. I mean after i ran the 100 metres time trial my coach offered, and some throws, it is hurting like so much now. sigh. gonna ice it and see if anything better happens to it.

jav competition on the 21st and 100 metres on duno what day for sports day. i hope i can recover by then. it seems far but recovery takes quite a fair bit of time.

i keep seeing u around, but i dont know what to do, i wanna be there yet i dont want to, cuz for now, i jus want to escape and run away.

i dont feel like doing anymore work. i cant. i cant stop thinking about my stuff and about you. i mean its really silly, but im trying to let go, yet im trying to hold on. its so foolish of me. i dont wanna be hurt again, but that doesnt mean ure all about hurt. its about how much im willing to go for you that hurts me, cuz will it ever last? i dont know... i hardly know much about u, but from what others have said, and my own feelings, it jus speaks otherwise.


im so stressed out by so many things. sigh.

if i were to fall, i'll think of you,
because it jus seems that u meant everything to me.
there was no doubt that it would be difficult,
difficult to carry on and hold on.

i were to slash myself,
over and over again.
but it is this period of time,
where my feelings are most true.




;
breaking free to something new. =)