sigh my class its gonna get smaller? i heard from 19 ppl to 16? its like so horrible. dammnit lar. feeling so pissed with this cjc life. i mean, why cant i have a nice really fun class, i always get an un united class. when no one cares anymore, nothing is being done. i dont feel united. we dont force ourselves to be united, but we should be as a whole naturally. guess its different and weird how things turns out.


my desire for the minimal ends here, where we go and what we do, its another part of our life we discover. sometimes, i dont know why i think of you. maybe its jus pure stupidity of me. but the more im trying to avoid you, im beginning to see that your lifestyle will never suit mine. but it ithces inside, it sometimes wonder why it has to feel like this. i hate to feel as if im in love, because i wanna know im not. i cant let my guard down, no i must not, i must not let anyone know that im weak inside, and i love you so easily, but its only you dont u see? maybe i should slowly fade away, because the pain, will make me grow and harden what i call, my heart.


i wouldnt lie to you, because all the truth will be told if i were to look at you into your eyes. because, i have came to see that ure a little different, maybe jus so cute. but its not that anything is standing in my way or yours, but what is most upsetting is that im destroying myself because of you. sorry.



"im stubborn,
im selfish,
i do anything,
jus to kill myself.

and when i die,
i wished i'll die,
right in front of you.
because i want my last words to be

i love you"



so what will go on from here. im not sure i guess. we'll see, as i struggle inside, jus to show im alright...




;
breaking free to something new. =)